I admit it. I'm tired. I'm tired of spending hours in transit, of wearing my undies inside out (or more often, simply sleeping in my clothes--piling up the layers to keep in the warmth, and continuing in the same clothes for several days). My body is tired of the random meals dependent on location and the odd sleep schedules. New Mexico was a very butter-inspired and lazy stop, San Francisco was a greasy, alcohol-y, couch-hopping stop, and Portland was a very coffee and thankfully veggie-filled stop, though also a little sleep-deprived. In Kansas City, I found myself eating ludicrous amounts of cookies and random meatless side-dishes (which in my family are few and far between, with the sentiment being: you know, bacon, chopped into minuscule pieces, will really make it better). At this point, the idea of my own kitchen, bed, and a job I can attend at continuous intervals, and with semi-normal hours is a wildly romantic idea. Ahhh... I can't wait.
So, I've decided to return to Iowa City, where I will assist my truly wonderful midwife in delivering babies--work I am much more passionate about than any sort of crappy job I could get on the west coast just to say I lived on the west coast. Sorry San Francisco, I love you, but I'm not willing to work full time at a retail job and then something else on the side to make ends meet. I'd rather spend my time doing things I love, and not in transit I might add, which is a bonus to Iowa City, where everything--from getting to a nice hiking spot, to a good cafe, to the co-op, to a yoga class--takes 10 minutes by bike or car, and with ample parking everywhere. And it's got all I need to keep me busy and fulfilled. It's a comfy spot...and I'll admit I feel a little guilty about not being more adventurous, but I am so so very happy with the simple idea of having a routine--working, going salsa dancing with my friends, eating normal meals, seeing people on a consistent basis, having an exercise routine, etc. Oh my, it's like a dream come true....wait isn't that most people's lives and they simply don't appreciate the sheer wonderfulness of it???? As the Zen proverb says, "Everyday life is the only way." Seeing beauty in the routine and ordinary, enjoying each moment, sharing good food with good friends. Sigh...and yippee!
So for now, I guess this ends my adventuring in the geographical sense (for now...I do plan to return for the next Patch Adams Peru trip in July). I will instead be venturing inward to a world of meditation and yoga, cooking, winter walks, good literature, and maybe learning the harmonica!
until next time, love, Rachel
3 comments:
hey rachel!
i love this post. i can relate with everything you're saying. i think for people like us it certainly does take some time thrown out of our element to appreciate and understand what exactly our element is.
my school schedule just changed from 3:30-9:30 PM to 10:30 AM - 3:30 PM. I can already tell I'm going to love it. One of the big surprises for me in Korea was realizing how much I hate working late into the evening, staying up until 4:00 AM and waking up the next day at 12:30. That became the easiest way to manage, but I really havent liked it. The thought of a normal 9-5 routine sounds really appetizing to me right now!
I might also add that the more time I've spent away from home, the greater appreciation I've developed for the midwest. I really think there is something distinct about midwest culture, and pretty soon I probably won't ever be able to take it for granted again! Enjoy yourself in Iowa City, bud!
will
Yes! I couldn't agree more about the special quality of midwestern culture. I think you can find great people anywhere, but there is a high percentage of genuine-ness here I would say....someday I'm sure I'll live somewhere else, and I'll certainly keep traveling, but for now, I really enjoy what I've got here. Thanks!
I'm so happy that you are putting yourself out there and feeling some awkwardness/discomfort to also better appreciate your own life. It's like I said, sometimes a little uncomfortable, but there's nothing like it to help you better understand what works for you in your life--schedule for example--I hear you on that one! I liked to call hospital nursing my experimentation in sanity and keeping different schedules. I worked several different variations of 8 and 12 hour shifts, overnights included. And it helped me see that I like consistency, so not 3 soul-sucking 12 hour days, and then 4 days off, and I prefer to see sunlight.
The hardest part I've found for me though, is sticking to what you know about yourself, and not letting other people make you feel like there's something better for you. Because when you're traveling--and maybe that's part of why I enjoy it so much--you're on your own completely, and if you want to do this at this time, and eat at that time, and stay up till z time, it's all your own discretion. Then when you get back you start throwing all these other things into the mix--other people's schedules and feelings, and it gets a lot harder...but for now, you get to enjoy the freedom of doing exactly what you want in each moment (except perhaps from 10:30am-3:30pm, but sweet schedule by the way). So, enjoy that! And really live up Korea for what it is! It sounds like you've got a good thing going on!
Cheers from snowy iowa :)
Rachel
What a lesson you have learned!
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